Parabola's Action 50: Part 2 + Play Report

First, the classes, then a quick play report. The next 15 classes continued from here. See also here. Another 50 have been made on the discord. Those I will leave for my own sanity.

1. Hour of Retribution (start with a rapier, a buckler, a pocketwatch)
1. You only need three hours of sleep. When you challenge someone to cross swords, they always comply.
2. When someone deals damage to you, your next attack against them deals at least as much damage.
3. You receive strange omens of danger, and are never surprised.
4. Once per day, go back in time by 1 hour.
2. Black Mantle (start with a black mantle, a pike, a bear trap, a grappling hook and rope)
1. You always count as at least lightly armored. It is impossible to tell if you are armed until you brandish a weapon.
2. Until you show otherwise, people always assume you have the same alignment as them, plus or minus some ennui.
3. You may enter an acrobatic rage, during which your attacks are based on dexterity instead of strength and you get +1d6 to dexterity tests. However, during this rage you must do things in the most over-the-top way possible, and take 1d4 fatigue afterwards.
4. You are invisible in near-darkness and can swim like a manta ray.
3. Secret Monk (start with a black robe, a crucifix hidden in a dagger, a bell)
1. You can make noises so that only allies hear it. You automatically recognize the signs of another secret monk.
2. In each dungeon or similar environ, there is always one “foe” who is actually a secret monk and potential ally.
3. During every combat in which you have not attacked anyone, heal an ally for 1d4 and grant them another attack that you dictate and roll.
4. Birds deliver messages for you.
4. Phantom Ship (start with ghost clothes, a journal, and a bow and arrows)
1. In every dungeon or similar environ there are always two potential lovers you must matchmake for. If you get them together, you heal all your HP and gain bonus XP. Also, you can take 1 damage to pass through a solid object, floor, or wall.
2. 3/day, charm someone. If you do, you are charmed by them.
3. Passing through solid objects, floors, and walls now takes 0 damage.
4. When someone who loves you (romantically or otherwise) is touching you, you cannot die.
5. Castle Fiend (start with a spellbook in blueprint form, a broom, and brass shoulderpads)
1. +1 MD. Cast architecture spells
2. +1 MD. Use magic dice to summon grotesques.
3. +1 MD. Use magic dice to summon gargoyles (grotesques with water class features)
4. +1 MD. May animate siege engines, ladders, and polearms.
6. Companion of Silence (start with sandals, a staff, a candelabra)
1. You may enter a trance that allows you to hear the nearest non-language noises in all directions.
2. While you carry a candle, nothing the candlelight touches can create sound.
3. Anyone sneaking up on you catches fire.
4. Whenever you harm someone, they cannot speak for 1 day per point of damage.
7. Demon Huntsman (start with a bow, arrows, lincoln green attire, and a brimstone)
1. You can speak with all game animals, but can only convince them to do things with a bargain
2. Whenever someone or something flees, you may make a free attack against it.
3. While tracking something, footsteps within 30’ of you burst into flames.
4. Whenever you win an animal’s soul, you learn anything it knew.
8. Destroying Sorcerer (start with a conical cap, a glass orb, your inventory's-worth of weapons)
1. +1 MD, you may reroll magic dice used for vandalism
2. +1 MD, you have DR 1 against people with less garish clothing than you.
3. +1 MD, you may take 1d4 fatigue to spread a harmful magical effect the following turn.
4. +1 MD, when you hurt someone’s feelings, get 10 XP.
9. Dice of Death (start with a spear, a pair of dice, three hand grenades you do not understand)
1. Once per day, your DM can make you reroll an action that is not harmful to someone. Once per day, you may choose to reroll an action that is harmful to someone.
2. When you damage someone, you can roll 2d6 damage instead; if you roll doubles, get some kind of wizard mishap.
3. When you damage someone, you can roll 3d6 damage instead; if you roll triples, get some kind of wizard doom. Whenever you roll a 6 on any die, take note. Every third six counts as a critical success.
4. At the start of combat, roll a d20 ten times. These are the results of the next ten d20 rolls you would make this combat. If you run out of numbers before the combat ends, you die.
10. Fatal Mystic (start with a dowsing rod that doesn't work, a morningstar that does, a heavy cloak)
1. You always know when someone nearby is dying. See death and life as glowing non-colors within 30 feet.
2. +1 MD, your grim pronouncements are always taken seriously.
3. +1 MD, when you ask questions through divination, you get one more.
4. +1 MD, You may foretell an apocalypse. Within a week, it will begin. Only true heroes can avert it.
11. Secret Assassin of the Old Stone Cross (start with a shovel, a sling and slingstones, black leather outfit)
1. Sneak attack as thief. Also, you have a perfect disguise as a gravedigger, night watchman, or skeleton.
2. Every Sunday, you can commune with some ghosts in a cemetery for clues about local or personal histories. Also, if you would sustain a fatal wound, this is represented by skeletal arms pulling you into the earth.
3. You get +1 to skill checks opposed by someone who does not know you are secretive, +1 if they do not know you are an assassin, and +1 if they do not know you are of the old stone cross.
4. When you lay a soul to rest or have a funeral, your party heals 2d6 hp.
12. Invisible Husband (start with a hat and monocle, a dirk, and an apron that says 'kiss the cook')
1. Your body is invisible. You always have bandages handy.
2. Those you smooch can fly for 1 minute. You cannot get the benefit from smooching yourself.
3. Choose one party member. They can see you, both literally and for who you are. Also, get +1d4 to attacks made while beside them.
4. You grill a killer steak. All lunches you help prepare heal +1 HP. Also, for ten minutes a day you may make your possessions invisible.
13. Invisible Assassin (start with a peasant hat and rags, a bow and arrow, and an apron that says 'kiss the cook')
1. Your body is invisible. You always have blowdarts handy.
2. Those you injure cannot make loud noises for 1 minute. You cannot get the effect from harming yourself.
3. Choose one party member. They can see you and spot for you, granting you advantage on stealth and ranged attacks as long as they do nothing else but assist you.
4. You grill a killer steak. You may prepare a meal that deals 1d6 damage to all who eat it. They must save vs. poison to avoid becoming incapacitated with nausea.
14. Dead Man Come to Life Again (start with two copper pieces, incense, your Sunday best, and a ceremonial dagger)
1. Learn an alignment language. Also, once per day,  tell a tale of the afterlife to heal yourself and others bound for the same destination 1d6 damage.
2. Remain conscious even after receiving a fatal wound. You can always get spirits, undead, angels, or demons to at least listen to you.
3. You can freely trade fatigue, trauma, and other inventory intangibles.
4. If you die, designate someone else to return to life.
15. Black Rider (start with a horse, a black cloak, and a named sword)
1. Use amazing scent to detect life within 50’ and track. Your mount has DR 2.
2. Those you stab save vs curses to avoid becoming a Black Rider.
3. +4 to hit while charging. You know the approximate direction of your quarry if they are on a road.
4. You attain the service of a fell and flighted drake.

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Play Report

Using the classes found here, I ran a two-hour session for Deus Ex parabola and an in-person player, represented by a Dead Man Come to Life Again (Gorlias Jones) and a Mysterious Dagger (Xen), respectively.

They met to discuss their vengeance against the Lady Artemis McQuarry and her pirate son, Cap'n Corey McQuarry, in the old church-turned-tavern, the "Open Cask," the spookiest gin joint in the decrepit town of Heathport.

Each had been wronged by one of the McQuarrys, and each had learned that magic prevented one from permanently dying unless the other soon followed them. So after some discussion, Xen led them in finding a chicken to sacrifice. After finding a coop, they woke up a nearby farmer to bargain for the chicken. Noticing several ghosts flying out of the old McQuarry House, Gorlias offered to banish them for the farmer in exchange for the chicken. After some haggling, the farmer agreed.

So, the Dead Man Come to Life Again has this ability which says "You can call the lingering soul of the dead to possess its corpse and answer one question." The intention of this ability was surely not to banish ghosts to their bodies and forgo asking them questions, but that is precisely what Gorlias did, banishing a variety of very spooky old-timey ghosts. This satisfied the farmer, who gave them a chicken.

So, the Mysterious Dagger has this ability which says "If used to sacrifice a chicken, you can summon a random demon to this location." They immediately sacrificed the chicken. I happen to have an old set of rules for demons separated into then classes, from worm all the way up to Satan himself. Rolling a d10, they summoned the most minor of demons, an imp named Gobelthrane the Chicken-born. They offered a third of a soul if he would fly to Cap'n Corey's ship, the Black Krak'n, and tell him that his mother desperately needed him.

Meanwhile, the party proceeded to Lady McQuarry's home. The butler answered the door, but could not let them up to see the lady of the house because her band of drug-addled ruffians made further egress impossible. They circled around to the back of the house, bound Xen's original shmuck, and climbed up, where they encountered a spooky spectre. Gorlias pretended to be a ghost himself to attract Lady McQuarry, to no avail. Eventually, a different woman appeared, and Gorlias tricked her into taking the dagger, possessing her. Inspecting the spectre, they realized it was a prop, simply the work of a Scooby-Doo villain.

Coming into the Lady's bedchamber, Gorlias woke both her and her trained ape with his ghost impression. He convinced her to take the dagger, at which point Xen possessed her and threw the Scooby-Doo villain to the ape. She ordered the drug-addled ruffians to accompany her in an unspecified vengeance against her son.

Her son's crew, roused by the imp Gobelthrane, met the ruffians at the edge of town, where a skirmish began. Cap'n Corey McQuarry wept for the cruelty of fate, for as an Avenger's Doom, he detected that she was motivated by vengeance, and knew he must defeat her. Over the course of the battle, Gorlias drew the attention of the citizens of the city. Xen changed hands frequently, throwing himself into the neck of a pirate before being stolen by the ship's monkey. After leaving Lady McQuarry, her son realized something had changed and began to escort her back to the Black Krak'n. When Xen attempted to stab him again, the Corey realized the dagger's nature and cut it out of his crewmate's hand.

But Gorlias had already begun running in that direction. He quickly found Gobelthrane and convinced the imp to get Xen into a pirate's hands, offering three-thirds of a soul in exchange. Then, Gorlias boarded the ship and found the ship's powder reserve...

The imp got Xen into a pirate's hands easily enough. When the dagger climbed aboard the ship, the boatswain ordered his current shmuck to his station, which Xen angled into convincing the boatswain to grab the dagger, possessing him.  He knocked on the captain's door and cut Corey as he answered, only for the Avenger's Doom to kick him away and bar the door. The remaining crew cut down Xen's shmuck, with orders from the captain not to touch the dagger. Gorlias set a fuse belowdecks to ignite a mighty blast and destroy the vessel, with just enough time set to hurry topside, grab the dagger before it was thrown overboard, and flee down the docks.

Most pirates died in the explosion, or drowned, joined by Lady McQuarry. Her son managed to make it to shore, his waterlogged pistols unable to fire at Gorlias where he stood clutching the dagger. The Dead Man Come to Life Again throttled him with his deceptively strong funeral wrappings, dodging the swings the Cap'n made with a distressed crab he had found on the beach. And with that, Cap'n Corey McQuarry followed his mother into death.

Their vengeances fulfilled, Gorlias helped Xen to find a new schmuck, then returned to a comfortable unlife of gold prospecting. And they both lived happily ever after...