Picture Pong Against Matthias #1: I am that is

 Matthias of Liche's Libram has attempted to steal the pong intended for my dear semiurge. This cannot be allowed to stand, and I am utterly destroying it the only way I know how.

Here we see an illustration of the part of the brain responsible for the sensations of various other parts of the body. This knowledge is considered privileged information among the sixty-five scribes of Prive, who were separated and forced by a tyrant to list out the secrets which are forbidden to know in descending order of severity, and who were only spared because each wrote a list that exactly matched the other sixty-four. (The "Cortical Homunculus" was the twenty-seventh most severe secret.)

In the Clavicarcerum of the Scribe Jamesus, the tyrant put this secret to cruel effect, forcing the scribe to forge cortical nails, which when carefully placed can alter the mind and form of mortals.

(This operation is gruesome, but an unwashed adventurer can do it if they choose, provided they have a cortical nail and something to pound it in. The skull is only a momentary impediment.)

• A nail on the innermost fold affects the foot, which no longer flexes. It twitches when it crosses the spot where someone has died, or where a dead person is interred.
• A nail on the central top affects the hip, which no longer goes side to side. Weapons over your hip weep an oil that transmutes blood to silver.
• A nail off the central top affects the trunk, which no longer twists. Your appendix inverts in the presence of poison.
• A nail at the fold of the motor cortex affects the arm, which no longer rises. It will drag you away from danger if you are unconscious.
• A nail further down from that affects the hand, which no longer grips. It sweats glowing light.
• A nail at the temple affects the head, which experiences ego death. This is what happened to the guards of the Clavicarcerum.
• A nail behind the jaw affects the tongue, which goes slack. Its tastes sour in the presence of illusions, magic or mudane; spicy in the presence of primates (including humans) untouched by magic; and sweet on hallowed or unhallowed ground.
• A nail beneath the jaw affects the larynx, which goes silent. The inarticulate sounds you make echo up to twenty miles, and can only be heard by those you wish to hear them.

The effect is undone if the nail is removed, but having a hole in your head is liable to give you infection, proxima, or worse.

-

Hope your blog allows spider teats, Matthias.