Sweetheart D&D

Daniel Romanovsky

Alright, so I'm doing that thing everyone eventually does where I reinvent the wheel of D&D. The basis is like Skerples's GLOG rules when it doesn't say otherwise. Aren't you people supposed to lean towards rulings over rules?

This article will mention the basics, later ones to go into further detail.
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NUMBERS AND RACE

• 4d6, drop lowest, any order
• 3+con HP per level
• roll-under attacks
• 30 ft. base move speed.
• Enemies attacking you get a penalty equal to your dex mod plus any armor bonus. This is AC.
• Enemies tripping, grappling, etc. get a penalty equal to your dex mod plus your attack bonus. This is maneuver defense(?) It needs a better name.
• Carry a number of things equal to strength score. For every thing you carry in excess, you get a -1 penalty to dexterity tests, AC, and resisting maneuvers. Points of fatigue are added to your inventory and recovered at a rate of one point per two hours spent resting.
• XP bleh. One simple way to treat levelling up is that each session in which a character makes significant progress, whatever that means, they get 1 XP. Once the amount of XP equals the next level, they spend that much XP and gain a new level. 
• Each class has up to 10 levels, but characters may take levels in multiple classes, though the number of classes a character possesses may never exceed half of their level (after first level.

Race	Advantage	Disadvantage	Reroll
Human	Extra skill	Forgetful	any
Warforged	Modular	Maintenance	str
Orc	Bonus vs. divine	Save vs. beauty	str
Dwarf	Crafted proficiency	Save vs. full moon	con
Gnoll	Shaper	Save vs. conformity	con
Hobbit	Second breakfast	20 ft. speed	dex
Eulogy	Prone without penalty	cold-blooded	dex
Ordena	Extended critical range	Hamartia (extended critical range)	int
Locust	Brief flight (begin/end turn on foot)	Hibernation	int
Elf	One with nature	Save vs. ugliness	wis
Suriah	Natural duelist	Save vs. passion	wis
Birdfolk	Mimic sounds	Pushed back by blows	cha
Serset	Possession	Parasitic	cha

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• Human: Pick any one skill and become proficient in it. The DM doesn’t have to remind you of something your character should know (but won’t be too cruel with this ability.) You can reroll any one attribute.
• Warforged: (Magitech automatons) You can have any conceivable mechanism installed into your body. This requires craft tests. You do not heal naturally, and need to spend two hours with a repair kit every day to heal hp. You may reroll strength.
• Orc: Divine magic is not accustomed to you, conferring a +3 to saves against it. When you are confronted with beautiful things you must test any mental attribute or shun it. You may reroll strength.
• Dwarf: You are proficient in all craft skills. When you are exposed to the full moon, you must test wisdom or be transfixed by it until it leaves your sight. You may reroll constitution
• Gnoll: You gain a bonus based on the last significant creature you ate. If it was an intelligent race, get a +2 to the reroll that race gets. If it is a monstrous creature, gain a themed ability based on its capabilities. When you would oppose the consensus of your group, test charisma or go along with them. You may reroll constitution.
• Hobbit: If you have a hearty meal, you may heal an additional 1 HP per level per day. Your base move speed is 20 ft. speed. You may reroll dexterity.
• Eulogy: (reptile people) You know how to slither, and take no penalty for being prone. Since you are cold-blooded, you cannot survive long in extreme heat or cold. You may reroll dexterity.
• Ordena: (Grey philosopher race) In combat, you score a critical success on a 2. Foes targeting you score a critical success on a 2. You may reroll intelligence.
• Locust: (grasshopper people) Once every other round, a locust may flutter through the air, flying 100 feet and landing on a sturdy surface. You must hibernate seven out of eight years. You may reroll intelligence.
• Elf: You can exist comfortably in the wilderness, and are proficient in survivalism for the purpose of jaunts. When you are confronted with grotesque things you must test any mental attribute or shun it. You may reroll wisdom.
• Suriah: (stocky saffron-colored people) Once per day while wielding a bladed weapon, you may parry an incoming attack, reducing its damage by 1d12. When you feel a very strong emotional urge you must test intelligence or act on it. You may reroll wisdom.
• Birdfolk: You can perfectly imitate other voices, and test charisma to imitate other sounds. Because of your hollow frame, any time you take damage you are sent away five feet from the source of the harm. You may reroll charisma.
• Serset: (mind-controlling slugs) When you crawl into a target’s ear, you can access the brain and pilot them. This does not require a test, though you aren’t allowed to test to evade any attempt they make to stop you. You start with a host of your choice, and can read basic emotions it feels. In your true form, you are a pitiful slug. Your physical attributes outside of your host have a score of one. Hosts do not add bonuses to your abilities; your primary attributes are a measure of how you use your body, not the body you have. If your host dies while you inhabit it, you will suffocate in an hour. As long as your host is alive, you can burrow out of its ear, a process which takes 3 rounds. You may reroll charisma.

Oh, also some preemptive attributions:

• All art by Daniel Romanovsky
• Thanks to Arnold K. of Goblinpunch, for originating GLOG
• Thanks to Skerples of Coin and Scrolls, for GLOG: Rat on a Stick Edition
• Thanks to LadyTabletop, for some binder taboos
• Thanks to DNDSpeak, for some binder taboos
• Thanks to Bully Pulpit Games, for the Warren
• Thanks to my brother, for his take on Glint, and other touches
• Thanks to Mark Halton, for origination thief’s rope
• Thanks to Solomon, for his Lesser Keys
• Thanks to Princess and Pioneers, for the measure cantrip
• Thanks to Lou Keep, for his article on Gri-Gri