There's a Zungeon in my Dungeon! d10 Seussian Loot

Dr. Seuss was a great poet and artist; let's mine his art for game ideas.

d10 Seussian Loot:

1. Key Slapping Slippard: put this small creature in any lock and it will dutifully slap any keys away, effectively sticking the door. Killing a slippard brings down a terrible curse.
2. "Happy Fingers" Cap: this garish cap has a plastic hand glue to the top. While wearing it, control it with full range of motion.
3. Ooblek: a magical glue that falls from the sky. Wizards can probably make this somehow.
4. Thing Box: Twice a day, summon a loyal but madcap servant.
5. Thneed: an item all adventurers need. Can change shape to that of any mundane item worth 5 gp or less.
6. Wocket: (or Wackpack or Wurlap sack or what have you.) This is a small creature that lives in your first equipment slot and gives advice if you are friendly. Give it a random skill from below:
1. dreaming
2. geography
3. cryptozoology
4. green food preparation
5. military strategy
7. Tough-tufted Prickly Snick-Berry Switch: a one-handed weapon that also inflicts a point of fatigue with each hit.
8. Triple-Sling Jigger: a wheeled apparatus that fires three beanstones at once.
9. Jigger Rock-Snatchem: a wheeled apparatus that catches missiles and returns them to their sender as quickly as they are caught.
10. The Kick-a-Poo Kid: a nuclear grenade capable of destroying countrysides. Does not penetrate border walls.

A Triple-Sling Jigger and Jigger Rock Snatchem

A note on the 5000 Fingers of Dr. T: this live-action film is essentially a ready-made dungeon populated by Dr. Seuss. The dungeon boss, a tyrannical piano teacher, has kidnapped five hundred boys to play a single, impossibly long piano. Complete with wandering monsters, dungeon guards, accoutremont, and several levels of torture chamber, I would love to see a play report set in the film.

GLOG: Architect Wizards

Who actually sets out to design a dungeon?

Alexander Brodsky

Architect Wizard

Suggested skill: architecture or mechanics

Perk: ARCHITECTURAL LETTERING. Anyone can use your spell scrolls without training.

Drawback: If you ever try to actually get work as an architect, you will get the strangest clients imaginable.

Cantrips:

1. Drill
2. Level
3. Measure distance

Spells:

1. Arcane lock (devise a riddle that must be solved to unlock a portal or container)
2. Sympathy (two similar items borrow each other’s temperature, direction, or light. Strength of the bond increases with [dice].)
3. Colorless Light
4. Magic Mouth
5. Flawless function (mechanism works without defect)
6. Alarm
7. Dig
8. Speak with Devices (a device's intelligence is roughly equal to its complexity)
9. Wardline (invisible line of magic that can be triggered and can exert slight force or activate a spell)
10. Disassemble

Mishaps

1. Spell die only return on a 1-2 for 24 hours.
2. -3 to all tool checks, including armed attacks, for the encounter.
3. Take 1d6 damage.
4. For the rest of the day, you can only move in straight lines and right angles.
5. The next blow a foe inflicts on you deals triple damage.
6. The taunting muse of your masterpiece glimmers; cannot sleep until you spend eight hours (cumulatively) designing a dungeon.

 Dooms:

1. All pages on your person shrivel. You cannot regain burnt die for 24 hours.
2. From now on, casting a spell requires the use of a tool (any tool) as a focus.
3. The ground swallows you up into the dungeon dimension, where you are forced to fill out non-euclidean blueprints for eternity.

Mesomergos Generators

Primarily for my own convenience, but feel free to explore this strange region of a strange world if you wish.